Shay Ramsee | Self-Relationship Coach / Certified Women’s Empowerment Life Coach / Certified Happiness Coach
But here's what no one tells you: self-love isn't a destination. It's a practice. And sometimes, you fall out of love with yourself.
For 13 years, I worked as a Certified Nursing Assistant. I cared for people at the end of their lives—bodies that had carried them through decades, minds holding memories of roads taken and not taken, hearts still carrying regrets.
And you know what I heard over and over? "I wish I had lived differently."
Not "I wish I had more money." Not "I wish I had been more successful." But I wish I had chosen myself. I wish I hadn't waited. I wish I had built the life I actually wanted.
For 13 years as a wedding planner, I watched women stand at the altar of the biggest day of their lives—but so many had lost themselves getting there. Buried under expectations, opinions, and everyone else's vision of who they should be.
I helped them find their way back. To what actually mattered. To themselves.
And somewhere between holding the hand of an 80-year-old woman who whispered "don't wait like I did" and watching another bride realize she'd been planning a wedding for everyone but herself, I understood something:
I didn't fall in love with myself overnight. I fell into it—one choice at a time.
At 32, after a decade of showing up for everyone else's dreams, I hit a wall. My doctor told me I was five years away from diabetes. That's when I finally got angry enough to choose myself.
I didn't wait for permission. I bought two cookbooks, learned what my body actually needed, and dropped the version of myself who apologized for taking up space. The body I wanted someone else to give me? I built it myself. The style I wanted to embody? I created it from a Pinterest board with 174 pins of the woman I was becoming.
From Certified Wedding Planner
To Self-Relationship Coach
We don't hold space for our own pain. We don't anticipate our own needs. We don't stay present with ourselves the way I stayed present with my patients. We don't honor our own becoming the way I guided my brides to honor theirs.
Then came my own breaking point. A conversation with a pregnant friend living the life I thought I wanted. And I realized: I knew exactly what I wanted professionally, but personally? I had no idea. Every role I envisioned—wife, mother, entrepreneur—was about giving to someone else.
So I asked myself: What can I give to myself that's as fulfilling as the roles I play for others?
That question broke me open.
I realized the lifestyle I want is so specific, so deeply mine, that no one else can build it for me. Only I can create the life that feels like I never need a break from it.
So I did what I've always done: I chose myself. Again.
And I decided I wasn't going to be one of those people at the end of their life wishing they'd lived differently.
This is why I created The Blooming Muse.
Because I spent 13 years witnessing what happens when people don't choose themselves. When they wait. When they prioritize everyone else's vision over their own.
And I spent 13 years helping women create one beautiful day—when what they actually needed was to build a beautiful life.
I don't teach you how to think about loving yourself. I teach you how to practice it—the way you'd care for someone you were entrusted to protect. Because self-relationship isn't abstract. It's embodied. It's daily. It's the small moments of noticing, tending, honoring.
It's what I did for my patients. It's what I did for my brides. And now I'm teaching you how to do it for yourself.
Most of us are terrible at caring for ourselves the way we deserve to be cared for.
Here's what I know for sure: the quality of your relationship with yourself orchestrates everything else. When you genuinely fall in love with yourself, you stop accepting relationships, opportunities, or situations that don't honor your worth.
This work isn't for women who want quick fixes. It's for women who are done waiting. Done performing. Done building lives that look good on paper but feel empty in practice.
You don't need to be fixed. You need to be seen—by yourself first.
I'm a certified women's empowerment coach, happiness coach, and fitness coach—not because I had all the answers, but because I refused to be another person at the end of their life wishing they'd chosen differently.
I've held the hands of people who ran out of time. I've watched women lose themselves in everyone else's expectations.
And I decided: not me. And if you're reading this—not you either.
The love story you've been searching for? It starts with you. And it starts now.
Because "I wish I had lived differently" isn't something you say at 80.
It's something you prevent at 30, 40, 50—by choosing yourself today.